I was late to work this morning because I overslept, I think I'm too comfortable with my alarm clock.

My Dream:

I dreamed that I was an actress on Dave Chappelle's show but I didn't know exactly what I was supposed to do. Dave was in the bed with me and then he got up and this really ugly girl came in (she was supposed to be cute in the skit, but she was really ugly, at least I thought she was) and got in the bed next to me and I guess part of the skit was for us to pretend like we're making out. and I was like "ew, no way!!" and Dave Chappelle was looking at me from the audience and he was mad cuz I messed the joke up. so then after the show when everybody had left, me and the ugly girl had to shut the place down and there was an alarm clock by the bed that went off. we pressed every button on the clock and it wouldn't turn off. I even unplugged it and threw it on the ground (in the dream!!) and it still wouldn't go out, so then I ended up carrying it around with me, I even remember the buttons on the clock, it had weird buttons like "save query" and a button that said "button". So me and the clock went up stairs and this girl who works with me (but I never talk to, I only know her cuz she went to Riverwood) was going up the stairs too, she had hurt herself and she looked in pain, I asked her what happened and she said the sprained her ankle and that she played "deca football" whatever that is. Keep in mind, this is all over the alarm clock, she was talking loud and everything...

it was really weird.

Labels: dream, work

Sunset Boulevard (1950)

With Divah on my lap, I watched Sunset Boulevard tonight. I can't tell you how great this story is. The dialogue, storyline, the... everything. I couldn't even quote a few lines from the movie because there are so many great lines. Its like eye butter.

The story is about an aging star from yesteryear. She has been tucked away in her mansion away from the public, which prefers younger women on screen. She has cooked up an awful grandiose script about a young Salome, of course she'll play the younger role. She wishes to get Cecil B. DeMille to direct it, but it needs some work.

In comes, Joe Gilles, a 30 something hack screenwriter, he agrees to ghostwrite the script for her, even tho he knows it sucks. She eventually falls in love with him and he keeps him hostage in her arms as a kept man.

The story is such a good movie, I know it's hard for some of us to watch black and white films, but the stories are so much better. I don't know how that's possible and as a screenwriter, I can't tell you how I aim to bring back that quality, as I guess it's too hard, once you think about it. Cat on a Hot Tin Roof was excellent, the whole thing was filmed mostly in one house, in one room, and it was a great study of acting and technical execution.

I will probably begin to post some great classic films as I think, they will help people watch the crap made now with more discretion.

Labels: my favorite things

If there is anybody out there, do you find anything wrong with this?

it was daytime on the plane

the sun sneaked into my window from its glare on cotton balls
light shined on the cook book I was reading
and I tried to think of which food you’d like-

then-
the clouds opened and revealed a whole town
submerged in darkness with orange lights burning


it was the strangest thing I had ever seen
(are we not of the same sky?)

me:

Labels: poetry, strange inspirations

I started playing tennis in spring of this year. And I must say I'm hooked. I go to tennis classes on Mondays and Wednesdays and I play a set or two every 2 weeks. I'm not great but for a beginner, I'm pretty good. It's something that drives me, much like writing. I just thought "hey I should start playing tennis" and from then on I've been super passionate. It just sucks that I don't have anyone to play with on a regular basis. Today, I stopped by the tennis courts and these little girls came and hit the ball to me, so I was able to get some fast paced practice in.

I feel the dramatic changes in my body. I get wrist pains, but I'm also getting some pretty toned guns and my thighs are getting firmer too (the better to wrap around you,my dear). I used to say that Serena was my "booty role model" because we're both well endowed but, I've since changed. Serena is too ripped for me, I wanna keep a soft feminine look and feel. So, i don't know how i'll keep my arms from getting super swole.

Here's Rafa Nadal, my favorite player. He's super cute and dreamy... oh, and he'll kick your ass on clay court. lol

Labels: improvement, my favorite things, sport

Ok, I need to lose weight. Me deciding to lose weight is really a decision I've made out of necessity, kind of. I have been lucky enough to carry weight well and that has been a crutch i've leaned on in the past, but I must get over it. If I do gain weight (and I have) then it goes straight to a certain area of my body that men love (hips and ass), that also psychs out my mind that if I do get a little thicker, it's okay.

But, it's not okay. Things aren't fitting like they used to. I've lost a lot of weight at one point of my life (40 pounds) and I kept it off for about 3 years, but it's slowly coming back and I don't want it to. Recently i've been starting and stopping my commitment to drop tow, but, i really must stay on track. Of course, it's a simple plan, eat less, excercise more and the energy and kinetics will burn the difference off. Simple. But, it's so hard!!

I envy people that don't have to deal with "food problems" and it sucks being one of those people that love food and food can't return the favor. My mother is smaller than me, but eats more than me and eats awful food, it's not fair... So, tomorrow (or today, since it's now 12:03), I am starting again and I'm promising myself to stay on the wagon this time. I think posting this will make me feel as if I'm signing in blood because I've told people and I don't want to be a liar. lol. So... here's my plan:

Food and Diet:

• Eat a reduced amount of carbs and when i do eat carbs, I will eat them in the morning and they will be complex carbs (whole grains).

• Eat more protein. Protein is what stops you from being hungry (that reminds me, I gotta start eating only when I'm hungry) so the more meat I eat, the more protein I get, the more muscle I'll create. Bon!

• I already eat vegetables, so I'm going to eat a green every meal. Less fruits, but fruits are good too.

• I'm a natural girl, so I'm going to try to refrain from refined sugars and corn syrups. They're not natural and they also make you retain water (that reminds me again, Drink more water)

Excercise:

I currently play tennis on Mon and Weds. for atleast 2 hours. But tennis is an-aerobic, which means its a stopping and starting motion. In order to burn fat, you have to continuously move. Tennis is fun and better than walking but it's not gonna really help get rid of my muffin top. I am getting some pretty firm biceps.

So, when i'm not in tennis, I will devote 30 minutes a day (at first) to the treadmill and elliptical, switch it up some. Not for nothing, but the treadmill is one the most convenient, most boring inventions ever. It's not strenuous, unless you make it, but it's still just soooooo boring. I loathe and avoid it, not because it's hard but because it's just so damn boring.

I'm tired of the bullshit too, I'm not doing this for "health." I'm completely healthy. I have no health conditions (I've had a thyroid disorder but it went away). I'm doing this to get rid of my side roll and so that I don't wake up one day and look like Mo'nique. (she's cute, I'm not hating but she's waaaayyy bigger than me and I do not wanna get to that point.)

So please, say a prayer for me and save from what ever fat ass free lunch my job may take me on. lol

yawn..... goodnight.

Labels: improvement, self image